My 💙 has gone

Hai and Salam everyone,

Well, from the title of my post, u will know the conclusion of what im going to say here.

To be honest, i fall for this guy name Kendrick. My best friends knew bout him and I enjoy talking bout him.

But, he was a very loyal guy that i've ever known. 💙. Unfortunately, he left this world on 25th June 2019. And he brought part of my heart with him.

Its been about 4 months he left us, but i keep thinking bout him from time to time. Its like, he is away on long vacation.

How I miss him so much..How i miss talking to him. And the best was, all my secrets are save with him. He is the best listener, ive ever have in my life. He never judge anyone.  He is very kind to everyone.

I would like to share  bout him here just because, i am proud to have u in my life even for a while..Allah lent u for me, and I am very grateful for that.

I wish and pray that I can find someone like u. But, i knew  it not that easy. But, i will keep on praying i will find one, one day.

I love u so muchhh Ken. And I miss u.
I will keep on writing about u. In case I miss u. I will reread what ive shared here.

Love,

Zakinah

My Heart is belong to Allah❤️

Salam everyone. Hallu.
I would say, my heart has been poked again. But this time, I don't put any hope coz, only God knows what inside me. I have no idea what has happened to my heart. And I surrender everything to God and go with the flow.
I am grateful to GOD for giving me another chance to experience this feeling.
But,seriously, I'm not clear of what in front of me and I just pray and let God decides for me as I am clueless of myself.
And, for the first time, I feel so nervous to be a leader to my business. And, again I'm grateful to God for the chance given to me. And I feel, this is the right time. Amin. 🙏🙏
❤️❤️

Salam Eid Day 16,

Hai, me again. Going to talk about my previous post while listnening to Alif Satar song, Penantianku.
Well, that someone seems to distance himself from me. Maybe it's the best. Only God. Knows.
Well, lets move on to a better future 
CHAIYOKKKK💪💪💪

Salam Eid Day 10,

Someone has opened my heart. But, its too early to tell.
I prayed to God to open his heart too for me if he is the one for me. If GOD WILL. 💓 Amin

Salam 17 Ramadhan,

Me again. The only platform that I trust to share my feelings. Ya Allah, berikan aku kekuatan untuk teruskan perjuangan ini. Hanya padamu aku berserah.

😷

Working world right now seems like Battlefield 😪

Hai, Salam Ramadhan ke 14 for year 2019.

I am still working at my current 'Battlefield'.
Just now, i just received a complaint of 1 out of hundred  projects i supervise.
And, the  complaint is all over FB. And that is the real situation im facing since im working here.

I have to be answerable of every circumstances  And im tired of all this.
I feel running away everyday from this job. I have to make everything seems to be perfect and i know i can't.
I have to make sure everyone satisfied in their way.
I have always having a thought of letting go of this job. But, i know, Allah has plan for me,. A better plan for me.
I did applied for a new job where i don't have to face those nasty netizen but I have to wait patiently for that.
Ya Allah,  only to u I submit and I pray that  the answer will be coming out soon.
I have endure this for more than 3 years and im not going to anymore.
Because, i've changed to someone that i didn't recognise anymore ever since.
Its not that, i am not grateful what Im having now, it just that, I can't do this anymore.
Im lucky to be given a strength from Allah to face all this and its time for me to go.
Ive always thanking Allah for giving me a very understanding family  Amway family and friends that always support me.
I quit for my mental health. Im so sick inside and I don't want to drag this any longer. It will kill me by killing the old. ZAKINAH that ive known as a happy person and always believe in herself.
I love myself.

Hai.
This blog is created to share my feelings not for everyone to read but for myself as a diary. Sometime, it would be good to write rather than sharing by talking.
Well, our life seems to be ups and down. Its normal. In my case, i never stop improving myself in term of everything despite having internal and external problem. I know everyone do have their own challenges.
But here, in my own world  i would love to talk bout  myself.
Well, first of all, I really wanted a job that i don't have to feel trauma just to figure out who is texting me or calling me. I have it now. 😭😭
I pray to God to Allah  that soon I can be in the job that I do not have to face that anymore. Maybe its too much to ask, but i would love too.
I feel don't have a control of my life since that 'moment'  And im frustrated all the way but im still holding on coz i knew i have my parent's blessings.
But, i just can't anymore coz this job really change me for being me and i hate that.
Ya Allah, i do hope and I pray to You Ya Allah, for this coming holy month of Ramadhan, i'll be given a better place with better surroundings, better colleagues, better job that I can handle with.

Ya Allah, i hope my pray will be answered soon. Ya Allah the Almighty  Amin